Tantrums are a common part of childhood, often triggered by frustration or overstimulation. As a parent, finding effective strategies to manage these emotional outbursts can be challenging. One powerful tool at your disposal that most parents don't think about is music.
The Power of Music in Managing Tantrums
Research shows that music can serve as an effective distraction during tantrums. Familiar songs can create a sense of comfort, calming songs can lower heart rate and help children come back to a regulated state quicker, and engaging rhythms of faster songs encourage participation, helping to redirect your child's focus away from the big feelings they can't express or verbalize yet.
Top Songs for Calming Tantrums
To help you navigate tantrum time, consider creating a calming playlist. Here are some common songs that are effective in soothing children:
- "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star"
- "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong
- "I Want to Hold Your Hand" by The Beatles
- "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
- "Canon in D" by Pachelbel
But the most important part of picking a song isn't the song -- it is YOU. Can you sing the song soothingly? Can you access it to play easily? Songs that you know and can sing to create relational bonding with your child and help co-regulate with them to calm are going to be the most effective.
How to Use Music Effectively
- Immediate Response: Sing a fun, upbeat song that your child loves when you notice signs of an impending tantrum.
- During Meltdowns: If your child is already upset, sing softly and rock them or hold them (if they will allow) to create a calming environment.
- Routine Integration: Incorporate music into daily routines to help your child feel more secure and reduce resistance to transitions, which are often the source of tantrums. If you recognize a trigger event or time of day for your child to have a tantrum, how can you creatively incorporate music to help them cooperate, calm, or experience that part of day more easily?
Additional Strategies for Tantrum Management
While music is a great tool, it should be part of a bigger strategy that includes acknowledging emotions, creating a calm environment, and identifying triggers to prevent tantrums. How to effectively do this will be outlined in an easy-to-implement, systematic way in the Purposeful Parenting course -- coming soon! Join The Classical Collective group to be notified first when it goes live and for an exclusive discount.
Using music during tantrum time can help diffuse emotional outbursts and foster emotional resilience in children. By curating a thoughtful playlist or list of songs you can sing and integrating it into daily life, parents can create an atmosphere where children feel understood and supported, making tantrums easier to manage. And isn't that what we want as parents? A smoother day for us, growth for our children, and a happy, calm home environment.
